Shit changes fast around here, and as soon as I’m used to the current state of things, it changes again. I’m still in survival mode. I say still because I think I shifted into it somewhere around my sixth month of pregnancy, maybe somewhere around my second round of strep throat? The “baby” is now …
Parents, you are doing everything wrong! Yes, I mean you. Every. Thing. That’s what the headline read as I scrolled through my newsfeed on my phone while nursing my 3 month old (apparently that’s another big no-no, no phones while breastfeeding. Babies need eye contact while nursing. PUT YOUR PHONES DOWN RIGHT NOW AND ENGAGE …
Attention parents, you are doing everything wrong Read More »
During your first pregnancy, everyone wants to give you advice. People are bursting at the seams to share their tried and true parenting hacks with you. They will tell you that you absolutely-without-a-doubt must breastfeed, or give formula, or co-sleep, or sleep train immediately, or whatever the parenting trend is at the time. When you’re …
The second labor may be faster, but everything else is a lie Read More »
Becoming a mother has been one of the most rewarding (awful), magical (terrifying), and amazing things that has ever happened to me. I cannot even begin to fully explain the range of emotions that it fills me with every single day. It also gives me a whole new appreciation for my own mother. I see …
I’m sitting in the driver’s seat. My two year old is in the back in her car seat, losing her ever loving mind because her shoe came off. Actually, her shoe didn’t come off, she took it off. Then she threw it onto the floor. Now she’s filled with the burning rage of a …
I’m sitting on the toilet, pretending to eat a fake carrot as my toddler stands less than an inch from my bent knees begging me to keep going. “Eat more, mommy.” She says, and pushes the carrot back to my face. Again I make the “om nom nom” noise and pretend to nibble on the …
Parenting is not about the wins, it’s about living to fight another day Read More »
If I had known that it was going to be the last time, I would have taken our picture. One of you falling asleep the way that you had every day of your entire life. Your eyes were usually half closed with a happy smile playing around your lips, all of your focus on nursing. …
On my daughter’s second birthday, a season of lasts Read More »
Yesterday my husband and I celebrated our one year wedding anniversary. It was a wonderful day in which he treated me to breakfast in bed. We sipped champagne and ate our leftover wedding cake before taking off for a leisurely day where we walked, just the two of us, in and out of shops and …
Dear AARP, I am writing to you today on behalf of my uterus. Or maybe I’m writing on behalf of my ovaries, hell, how about you just accept this letter on behalf of the whole kit-n-caboodle. You see, I have been informed by my OB that due to the fact that I will be over …
On the 19th I will turn 35, making these my last few dying days in my early thirties. I thought I’d approach this day with sadness at the loss of my blush of youth, regret for the things that I didn’t do with my life (still haven’t written that Great American Novel, have I?), and …